mint huffers anonymous, medical mysteries, and serendipitous hiccups

Hosanna's new thing is an obsession with mint. Wintermint gum, Altoids, mint chocolate chip ice cream, and mint Mentos. The best part is that she is practically snorting the wrappers beforehand. Every time she takes an Altoid she sniffs the box for like twenty minutes first. Same with the gum wrappers. "Sniiiiiiiffffffffffff...... AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" It's truly a wonder to behold.

Some of her blood test results have concerned our midwife a little bit. Her iron is low and her body doesn't seem to be processing sugars quickly. So, now she is taking ferrous gloconate supplements and she has to watch her sugars and carbs. This is really hard for her, especially since she pretty much wants to eat fruit all day, every day. And especially especially now during the summer when the watermelon is ripe & juicy. Her favorite food in the world is watermelon.

For that blood test they first gave her a glucose drink that she described as being like orange soda with twice the sugar and none of the carbonation. Yummy! Then she had to wait an hour before they stabbed her with a needle and sucked her blood like vampires in white coats. She is terrified of needles, so I sang to her while they did it. The stinky thing is that since the first results came back "ungood" she has to take a second, deeper test, which apparently involves more de-carbonated hypo-sugar orange yumminess on top of a eight-hour empty stomach, then more needles and blood sucking every hour on the hour for three hours. I'm going to stab the next doctor I see in the chest with a wooden stake.

Good news, though; among our midwife's other recommendations were that Hosanna eat more protein, drink LOTS more water, and walk after every meal. This is helping her feel much better. She's perkier since adopting this new feeding & exercise regimen. This makes her sound like a horse. She's not a horse. She's a Hosie.

It's been over a hundred degrees here in Sacramento for the past three days. All I have to say is, I'd like to suggest any 7+ month pregnant people avoid that sort of weather - it doesn't really look all that fun.

Cute/weird anecdote: at our last prenatal visit, the midwife was telling Hosanna that she needs to start counting baby movements (10 within an hour is the goal - we get there in about 5 minutes, usually), and that hiccups don't count. Hosanna said "what do hiccups feel like?" The midwife started explaining that they are rhythmic and small, and feel much different from kicks & other movements. Hosanna was just about to say that she's never felt them, when the baby got the hiccups. As if to say "here Mom, they feel like this, OK?" Hosanna swears that that is the first time the baby has had them. Or at least, the first time when Hosanna was awake.

I'm still talking to our budding soccer player (aka little Pele). Give it little updates on the A's, like telling it about Rich Harden's near-perfect game last night against the hated Texas Rangers. Pele responds to my voice more now. That's really, really cool. Except for when I say something the babe doesn't like, and Hosanna gets punched in the cervix. Ouch.

Oh yeah - and we're starting to see vaguely recognizable body parts poking out every now and then. That has to be one of the weirdest things I have ever seen.

My Body Is A Well Oiled Machine

Yes. I've officially given over control to "the pregnant body." My hips are expanding. My stomach has ridden the uterus elevator up several floors so that it now sits pretty much right under my huge, huge boobs. In fact, pretty much all of my internal organs have moved up to the penthouse to accomodate the new tennant. I'm getting front-heavy, so I have to be careful not to walk too fast lest I tip over like a weeble-wobble. My craving for mint is inexplicable, since it made me want throw up only a few short months ago. Now I can't seem to get enough. Sleep. Pee. Eat. Pee. Rub tummy. Pee. Repeat. Aside from the back pain and heartburn and the weird leg cramps in the middle of the night, I feel great. Being pregnant is a trip. I realize this is what my body was ultimately made for. It's amazing. It has been a wild ride, and I'm loving it.

cravings

Hosanna wants to eat her toothpaste. "It's so sweet and tasty!" she says. What else has she been wanting to eat lately? Let's see here:

• her chapstick.
• her lipstick.
• the shower gel.
• basically, anything that smells good, especially if it's minty.

She's beeen crunching ice nonstop for about three weeks now. She wishes the ice could be minty. She gets a big cup of ice water, waits for the ice to melt a bit so that it's a good size for chewing, then asks me to drink all the water.

She is getting big now. Her belly button has nearly completed its transformation from an innie to an outie.

We started calling the babe Pelé, because it is kicking her so much.

We get to go on vacation this week. Thank goodness.